Posted in A blog, To this broken heart...

I Can See Elsewhere

I suddenly wanted to write a poem, so here is it. This is for young people who have their own big dreams! Keep on believeing!

Thank you for reading!


 

 

Someone told me, I have nowhere to go

Then I can’t stop my tears to flow

I have dreams that lead to nowhere

Then, why do other kids have “elsewhere”?

 

Walls that were created to stop me

Dreams that were bound for them only

I am envious of that excellent award

I can’t face them and tell, “so what?”

 

I don’t think I deserve this

I want them to hear me, please

I beg for understanding and attention

I am seeing “elsewhere” as my conclusion

 

I have been keeping this pain

I had to stay low and plain

Deep inside, I want to yell

“I don’t want to be like this and be in hell.”

 

I want to believe that after a rain

There’s a rainbow and gold for me to gain

I had hope that there’s a brighter future

Than the present that looks like feature

 

Would someone tell me there’s a hope?

That life is just like a slope

There’s higher and lower part

And then the best part.

 

I don’t want to follow someone’s dream

Mine’s different from him

I don’t want to be controlled by any humans

I want to do it with my bare hands

 

I am sick of the pessimists

Adults are such bad artists

They don’t get me, so do I

Can they just stop telling me a lie?

 

I have a future

This is just a torture

A test to be passed,

Then a good conclusion, at last!

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Posted in A letter to Bangtan, Uncategorized

To Bangtan

I am not really sure if this will reach you or if you’ll be able to read this. I just hope so. And I do hope, too, that there’s someone who is kind enough to translate this, so that you’ll understand its content.


 

Bangtan, do you know how amazing the music that you produce is? It was so amazing that we ARMYs grew into millions. I am so happy that you are reaching your dreams now. I am happy that I am a witness to that. I am proud of you Bangtan! Don’t ever doubt yourselves and your talents! There will always be a room for improvements. Don’t ever give up, please!

You might hear insults from haters and it will make you upset, but please do remember that even though there are haters, you have fans… A FANDOM at that. We, ARMYs, are stronger than them. We protect you. We are always here!

You have faced a lot of challenges and stress, lately. You might think that it is very tiring, mentally and physically, that you just choose to stop right there. But keep on going. Rest, but don’t stop. Don’t you see? The sacrifices… the sweat… the energy… the time that you put into that always pays off? You are nearing the top, so don’t stop.

A while ago, I’ve read your messages when a month passed since you debut. Do you know how I feel? I cried. I feel happy and sad. I am happy because you consider us as a big part of your team… OUR TEAM. I am proud because you have passed that test of becoming rookies. I am sad, though. I never thought that you have faced such struggles on and before your debut. I cried. It makes me sad to think of the fact that I can’t be right beside you to wipe your tears or make you laugh whenever you feel down. But you have each other, right? And we’re always here to cheer you up! Continue performing in small and big stages and expect that we’re always there to shout and clap our hands while saying, “Fighting Bangtan!”

Don’t think you are less important, because you are all important. Bangtan is not Bangtan if there’s someone missing. So, don’t leave, okay? Promise? V, Jungkook, Jin, Rapmon, Suga, J-Hope, and Jimin, always remember that there’s always a rainbow after the rain… and in that rainbow are smiling and fabulous ARMYs. Let’s not forget each other.

Bangtan is my family! (my family after my original family, of course.) Like what Namjoon said, “A person to person relationship rather than a fan to idol.” WE ARE FAMILY, ARMYs and BANGTAN.

To BigHit Ent and to the people behind these boys’ performances, a lot of thank you for all the love and support that you’re giving them. We can see how you treat our Bangtan nicely. Please, continue taking good care of them!!! We will always look forward to the music that you create Bangtan! You never fail to surprise us.

If ever you feel lost and you don’t know your reasons anymore, recall that you swore to be a BANGTAN who doesn’t disappoint ARMYs, and at that, I am sure that you’ll remember your original intentions of why you entered this world—this chaotic yet amazing music industry.

To the weird faces, funny moments/scenes, cool covers, awesome MVs, and handsome boys, THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE! You deserve to be loved, there’s no reason. You just deserve it, so accept it and treasure it. You always work hard, and working hard always pay off.

WE LOVE YOU BANGTAN! ARMYs LOVE YOU, ALL OVER THE WORLD.

We might not reach you by hands, but we reach you by heart, and that’s a more soothing part!

I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU.

Fighting Bangtan Sonyeondan and ARMYs! Long live BTS! Long live ARMYs!

 

 

With so much love,

Your family member


 

NOTE: I am not certain if this makes sense but I tried to translate it using google. I hope it does makes sense.

 


 

나는 당신이이 글을 읽을 수있을 것이다 경우이 당신을 도달하거나 경우 정말 모르겠습니다. 난 그냥 그렇게하겠습니다. 그리고 나는 당신이 그 내용을 이해할 수있을 겁니다 있도록, 친절하게도이 번역하는 사람이 있다는 걸, 너무, 희망 않습니다.
Bangtan, 당신은 당신이 생산 얼마나 놀라운 음악을 알 수 있습니까? 그것은 우리 육군의 수백만로 성장 너무 훌륭했다. 나는 당신이 지금 당신의 꿈에 도달되도록 기쁘게 생각합니다. 나는 그에게 증거라는 것을 기쁘게 생각합니다. 나는 당신 Bangtan의 자랑 스럽습니다! 이제까지 자신과 당신의 재능을 의심하지 마! 항상 개선을위한 공간이 될 것입니다. 지금, 제발 포기하지 마세요!
당신이 싫어하는에서 모욕을들을 수 그것을 당신이 화가 만들 것입니다,하지만 싫어하는있다하더라도, 당신은 팬을 가지고 … 그에서 팬덤을 기억 마십시오. 우리 군대는 그들보다 더 강한입니다. 우리는 당신을 보호합니다. 우리는 항상 여기에 있습니다!
당신은 최근에, 도전과 스트레스를 많이 직면하고있다. 당신은 당신이 바로 거기 중지 선택하는 것이, 정신적으로, 육체적으로, 매우 피곤한 것을 생각할 수 있습니다. 그러나가는 유지. 나머지는, 그러나 멈추지 않는다. 당신은 표시되지 않는 이유는 무엇입니까? 희생 … 땀 … 에너지 … 당신이 항상 떨어져 지불에 투입하는 시간? 당신은 상단에 가까워, 그래서 중지하지 않습니다.
한 달이 경과 할 때 데뷔 이후 얼마 전, 나는 당신의 메시지를 읽었습니다. 당신은 내 기분이 어떤지 알아? 나는 울었다. 나는 행복하고 슬픈 느낌. 당신이 당신의 팀 … 우리 팀의 큰 부분으로 우리를 생각하기 때문에 나는 행복합니다. 당신이 신인되고 그 시험을 통과했기 때문에 나는 자랑스럽게 생각합니다. 그래도, 슬프다. 난 당신과 데뷔하기 전에 이러한 투쟁에 직면했다고 생각하지 않았다. 나는 울었다. 그것은 당신이 당신의 눈물을 닦아 또는 당신이 아래로 느낄 때마다 웃을 수 있도록 옆에 내가 잘 될 수 없다는 사실을 생각하는 나를 슬프게한다. 하지만 당신은 바로 서로가? 그리고 우리는 당신을 응원하기 위해 항상 여기! 크고 작은 단계로 계속 수행 우리는 소리와 말을하면서 우리의 손을 박수 항상 거기있는 거 기대 “Bangtan 파이팅!”
모든 중요하기 때문에 당신이 덜 중요하다고 생각하지 마십시오. 없는 사람이 있다면 Bangtan는 Bangtan되지 않습니다. 그래서, 좋아, 떠나 지마? 약속? V, Jungkook, Jin, Rapmon, Suga, J-Hope, 그리고 Jimin은 항상 … 항상 비 후 무지개가 있다는 것을 기억하고 그 무지개 미소와 멋진 ARMYs된다. 의 서로를 잊지 말자.
Bangtan 내 가족입니다! (물론 내 원래의 가족을 내 가족,.) Namjoon는 말처럼, “사람의 관계가 아니라 우상에 팬에 사람입니다.”우리는 가족, ARMYs 및 BANGTAN 내용입니다.
BigHit 후 ENT 이러한 소년 ‘공연 뒤의 사람들에게, 많은 당신이 그들을 포기하고 모든 사랑과 지원에 감사드립니다. 우리는 당신이 친절하게 우리의 Bangtan을 치료하는 방법을 볼 수 있습니다. , 그들을 잘 돌봐 계속하십시오! 우리는 항상 당신이 Bangtan을 만들 음악을 기대합니다! 당신은 우리를 놀라게하지 않았다.
당신이 잃어버린 느낌과 더 이상 당신의 이유를 모르는 어느 경우 ARMYs을 실망시키지 않는 BANGTAN로 맹세 것을 기억하고, 그에서, 나는 당신이 당신이 입력 한 이유의 원래 의도를 기억 거라고 확신합니다 세계-이 혼란 아직 놀라운 음악 산업.
이상한 얼굴, 재미 순간 / 장면, 멋진 커버, 멋진 MV를, 그리고 잘 생긴 소년에, 거기 주셔서 감사합니다! 당신은 이유가 없다, 사랑을받을 자격이. 당신은 그럴 자격이, 그래서 그것을 받아들이고 그것을 보물. 당신은 항상 열심히, 그리고 최선을 다하고 항상 지불.
우리는 당신에게 BANGTAN을 사랑 해요! ARMYs는 전 세계, 당신을 사랑합니다.
우리는 손으로 당신을 도달하지 않을 수 있습니다,하지만 우리는 마음으로 당신을 도달, 그것은 더 부드러운 부분!
사랑해. 사랑해. 사랑해.♥
Bangtan Sonyeondan 및 ARMYs 파이팅! 만세 BTS! 만세 ARMYs!

 

너무 많은 사랑을,
당신의 가족

Posted in A blog, To this broken heart...

You Again

I am not that typical kind of girl who had many EX’s. But I had a boyfriend. HAD. So, it’s a past tense.

I am writing now about this because I am a little confused.


 

I met him because of my cousin. We started as friends and it was kind of good because he’s kind. He eventually became my best bud. Even if I am aware of the fact the he likes me, I still did not acknowledged it and asked him that we just stay as friends.

Well, he respected that, but he still tried to court me.

For six months, he courted me. There’d be times when we’re talking by the phone or we’re just find time to exchange messages.

He was the first guy who gave me lovely flowers. He wasn’t the first one that I loved, but I learned to love him back. I believed that I could trust him. I had hoped that he will take good care of my heart.

On a Christmas day, we became a couple.

Well, it wasn’t very special because I only confirmed it through call. i told him that I’ve made up my mind, and that I want to try and make it work.

I hope it did. But it didn’t.

It’s a big disadvantage when you are in a relationship with someone who is attending a different school. But I trusted him.

Even if I try very hard to make it work, it still didn’t. We eventually lost contact after a couple of weeks, and before I knew it, we’re over.

There wasn’t any proper closure. I wasn’t even sure if he still loves me or not. And I cried every night asking myself why it didn’t worked out.

Our relationship didn’t reach a month span. It was such a pity to think about it.

After nights of wondering and crying, I learned to get over him. I learned to move on and believe that maybe, my forever doesn’t belong to him. I have realized that my life shouldn’t be wasted just because of a failed first try.

It’s been 2 years, and I am okay now– beyond okay.

The first guy that I loved courted me, too. But I decided to stay like this for now. I decided to enjoy my life while I am still young.

The annoying and irritating part was when he showed up, without any warning.

Why is it that when everything seems okay, he’ll come and ruin it?

First, he asked me if I’m okay. Well, I was okay.

After some questions, he reached his agenda.

He asked me if I still have feelings for him, and I answered a clear, “none anymore”.

He didn’t accept it nor rejected it. He told me that he wants a second try. He told me that he still loves me and that didn’t change during that 2 years that had passed.

I told him to stop lying and that I don’t believe him anymore.

I want to cry and ask him, “why now?”

I don’t have the wit to tell him that. I don’t have the courage to shove infront of him the pain that I’ve felt when he suddenly disappeared. Now, he’s back. He acts as if nothing major happened… as if I wasn’t hurt.

At the end of our conversation, I told him to grow up and respect my decision. He told me again that he loves me. He uttered that three words again, and he confused me a lot.

I told him that I am not the only girl in the world, and that we both deserve someone better… that it won’t work out anymore. He told me that even though there’s a million of girls on earth, I am the only one for him.

I wasn’t fluttered. I was pissed.

I told him that we can be friends, but he wants us to be more than friends. How about that? Ugh!

He told that he’ll wait. I don’t care now.

I don’t believe to his damn promises anymore. The last time I believe in those, I felt misery. I don’t want to go back to that feeling again.

I don’t want to be like that anymore.

Even if it seems that I still have feelings for him, can you tell me… will I accept him again?